Looney Tunes Fanon Wiki

This is a transcript for The New Looney Tunes Show season 1, episode 14c "Carrotblanca".

Fade in. Exterior: North of Africa, early 1940s. At a radio station somewhere, a shadowy Foghorn Leghorn shouts frantically.

  • Foghorn: Attention, I say, attention, all listeners, hear this, I say, hear this. A German scientist has been knocked unconscious by a large frying pan!

The camera focuses on a car drvien by Ralph T. Guard, carrying General Pandemonium (Yosemite Sam) who listens the radio announcement.

  • Foghorn: (voice only) An important document has been stolen! That is all.

The general points toward the road before it heads through a town called Carrotblanca. In the town, Usmarte (Tweety) looks worried before flying toward a hotel named Café Au Lait.

  • Tweety: I gotta hide!

He flies in, passing by many people, including Sam (Daffy) playing a piano.

  • Daffy: (singing) Who's got trouble?
  • Patrons: (singing) We've got trouble.
  • Daffy: (singing) How much trouble?
  • Patrons: (singing) Too much trouble.
  • Daffy: (singing) Well, don't you frown just knuckle down and knock on wood (he hits his head with a hammer)! Who's unhappy?
  • All: (singing) We're unhappy.
  • Daffy: (singing) How unhappy?

As the song continues, Usmarte finally lands on a stool of a bar near him before sighing of relief.

  • Tweety: Made it!

The yellow canary then looks concerned as he calls out to someone.

  • Tweety: Mr. Bugs, Mr. Bugs! I need to speak to you about something!

The camera focuses on a shadowy figure eating a carrot, revealing to be Bugs Bunny.

  • Bugs: (mimicking Bogart) Eh... what's up, doc?
  • Tweety: Mr. Bugs, I need your help (shows the document). The German Army is chasing me and I need you to hide that important document I recovered from them. It's for somebody who was sent here to make a better life for America and...
  • Bugs: (normal voice) That is the document swiped from that small man sucker?

Usmarte looks to Bugs.

  • Tweety: Well, this was from the American Army and they resquested me to recover it.

Bugs frowns at him. Then he waves his finger around.

  • Bugs: (sarcastically) Whoop-de-doo!
  • Tweety: He’ll be here tonight with a pretty lady.
  • Bugs: (normal tone/gasps) A dame?! (snatches quickly the document) Well, in that case, I’ll take that document.

A Basset Hound and a female rabbit enter on the hotel, being named George Slazlo (Barnyard) and Bunny Ketty (Lola).

  • Tweety: (notices to Bugs) That must be them. (sees them) Wait, they look like a couple.

As the two continue walking, with Bunny holding onto George cautiously, they pass someone, who eyes on her, smirking, being Captain Louis Renault (Pepé).

  • Tweety: (to the audience) Yep, they’re a couple alright.

The camera focuses on George, pulling up a chair for Bunny. However, Captain Renault quickly snatches Bunny, nearly lying her down in his arms, despite Bunny struggling.

  • Pepé: Bonjour, mademoiselle. Tell moi, do you come here often?

He begins kissing Bunny or at least trying to as Bunny dodges with George looking angrily at Captain Renault.

  • Barnyard: (annoyed) Hey! Get your hands off her, you little stinker! Can’t you see she’s taken?!

Bunny rise her fists, surprising Captain Renault, before the two get into a small tornado with punches being heard. Then a punch sound is heard, sending Captain Renault out of the tornado, being knocked to the wall.

  • Pepé: (sighs) She is shy, non?

A knocking sound is heard before The Crusher turns and prepares to open it. However, it slams open as a familiar drives in, opening briefly, showing the flattened Crusher.

  • The Crusher: (dazed) Duh, table for two?

Some of his teeth fell out. Then, when the car stops, Ralph gets out to open the car. Out comes Pandemonium while Ralph blews his bugle horn. Pandemonium comes toward Bugs, whom only eats another carrot.

  • Yosemite Sam: I’m General Pandemonium, the meanest, nastiest, high salutenist soldier in this animal army.
  • Bugs: Does your mother know you’re out this late?
  • Yosemite Sam: I’ve got word you’ve had that important document, you dinner jacket-wearing varmint!
  • Bugs: Gee, Greta, where’d you hear that?

Pandemonium reaches into his jacket, glaring.

  • Yosemite Sam: Let’s just say a little birdie told me (he chuckles and reveals Tweety).
  • Tweety: I've been forced to it. Please don't hurt me.
  • Bugs: You’re lucky because you had no choice (Tweety goes away).
  • Yosemite Sam: I want that paper, and I want it now!

The camera focuses on Bugs, reading the paper, who smirks to him.

  • Bugs: Paper?
  • Bugs: (rolling the paper and showing to him) You want this paper? (waves it) Well here ya go, boy.

Pandemonium pants with a grin as Bugs comes near a door.

  • Bugs: C'mon. Get the paper.

He whistles as Pandemonium nears the paper before Bugs opens the door.

  • Bugs: Fetch!

He tosses it to the basement with Pandemonium following. Just then, a chicken (Chicken Boo) is heard clucking as well as hitting and crashing while Bugs took out another carrot.

  • Yosemite Sam: (voice only) Curse my naïveness!

The camera focuses on George, seeing the waiters passing him and Bunny by.

  • Barnyard: Oh waiter. Uh, waiter.

However, they only pass by the couple, which irritates George.

  • Barnyard: (angrily) Somebody! (slams his fist) We demand some service! (calms down/to Lola) I’ll be right back, Bunny dear, with refreshments.

With that, he leaves the table. The camera focuses on Sam, with an ice pack on his head, who returns to the piano. He starts to play while Bunny smiles.

  • Lola: Long time, no see, huh, Sam?
  • Daffy: (noticing her) Yipe!

He ducks down a bit, then peeks, looking at her. He gets down on his knees and pleads a bit to Bunny.

  • Daffy: Please don’t hit me, miss!
  • Lola: Relax, Sam, I'm not Elmer. Anyway, will you please play a certain song for me?
  • Daffy: I hope you don’t mean that Knock on Wood song. I’ve got a splitting headache.
  • Lola: (grins) You know, my favorite song.
  • Daffy: (dryly) Oh, that one. (sighs) Alright.

He looks annoyed a bit, but starts to play a few keys, before Bugs coming quickly to him, glaring.

  • Bugs: I thought I told you never to play that song.
  • Daffy: Me? You think I wanted to play that?

Quickly, he came to Bunny’s table, pointing quickly.

  • Daffy: She made me do it! It was her, her, her!

He ducks under the table, bringing out signs pointing to her with many words saying Her and one labeled Not me. Bugs gasps, as he notices her. Bunny then looks up, smiling to him. Bugs twitches a bit, looking surprised.

  • Bugs: Bunny?

Fades to a flashback. In the past, Bugs was driving while Bunny was looking at the beautiful scenery.

  • Bugs: (voiceover) Bunny Ketty.

He yawned, placing his arm on her shoulder, much to her notice. Then, as Sam’s hands were playing, it showed both Bugs and Bunny dancing together at a place called The Coconut Groove. Then, it showed the happy couple having a romantic dinner, clinging their glasses.

  • Bugs: To us.

Finally, it showed Bugs in a trench coat waiting at the train station before noticing Sam carrying a huge stack of luggage reaching for the ceiling. Bugs looked confused, becoming concerned.

  • Bugs: Where’s my dream boat?

The camera focuses on Sam, who came out from a bag, showing a letter to him.

  • Daffy: She sailed solo and left this note!

Bugs took it before Sam, yelping, collided with all the items landing onto him.

  • Daffy: Gah!

Then, a bowling ball landed on Bugs’ foot, making him yell in pain. Then he winced as he held up his foot and hopped in pain a bit.

  • Bugs: Ooh, that smarts!
  • Daffy: Well, maybe if you didn’t bring so much junk!
  • Bugs: Hey, give me a break!

The foot started throbbing a bit before it stopped, Bugs groaned a bit as he recovered. Then the minute he opened the letter, he looked stunned at what he read. As he read it, something that appeared to be rain started dripping down onto the letter.

  • Lola: (voice only) Dear Bugs, I cannot go with you. We're different, you and I. Remember, we'll always have Pongo Pongo, Helsinki, Pismo Beach and Timbuktu.

Unknown to him, Sam was trying to spray some water from a fountain to a passing duck girl (Tina), though it failed. Bugs only looked stunned and perhaps a bit heartbroken and twitched at what he read. The flashback ends. Later that night, Bugs is holding a small glass of carrot juice as he frowns, looking at Sam.

  • Bugs: Of all the juice joints in all the towns in all the countries in all the world, she picks this one. I can’t believe it.
  • Daffy: (frowns) Ah, get over it, Bugsy Boy. Everyone has awkward things from the past come back to them every now and then. But I know what you mean. (snatches a juice) I had a girl once. Unfortunately, she dumped me for a country duck because she said something about being too into myself!
  • Bugs: (surprised) You? But you’re so friendly, (quietly) despite you always being menacing and destructive.
  • Daffy: I know! That’s what I kept telling her!

He drinks rapidly. Just then, the door opens up and Bunny enters.

  • Daffy: (glaring at her) Scram, lady! It’s way after closing hours!

Bunny looks stunned at what he said, before she frowns.

  • Lola: Why, Sam! I only came in to see a friend. But if you want to get so rude and attack people with remarks so uncalled for, I’m afraid I’ll have to let you have it!

She raises her fists at Sam, shocking him.

  • Daffy: But earlier, you said…
  • Lola: The script says I’m not allowed to punch you, but I'm opening an exception this time, since you deserve it.

Punching and yelping are heard before Sam screaming and being kicked out, landing on the ground.

  • Daffy: Ow. (gets out a notebook and pencil and starts writing) Note to self: never do anything to anger Bunny Ketty.

Inside, Bugs, who just witnessed what happened, only smirks.

  • Bugs: Not so friendly now, are ya?

Bunny comes toward Bugs with a worried look.

  • Lola: Bugs, my old friend, I need your help. They've arrested George. General Pandemonium thinks he knows something about that stolen document.
  • Bugs: I stick my fluffy rabbit tail out for no one, not even former acquaintances. So just forget it, sister.
  • Lola: (confused) Former? Oh please, Bugs, I’d really appreciate it if you went down there and sort out this whole mess.
  • Bugs: Sorry doll, but the answer is still no.
  • Lola: (angrily) Doll?

A sucker face is seen briefly on Bugs' face. At the police station, Pandemonium glared toward George.

  • Yosemite Sam: I want answers and I want 'em now.

Captain Renault only leans to a desk as George frowns.

  • Barnyard: Look pal, how many times must I keep telling you, Meat Breath? I don’t have that so-called document!
  • Yosemite Sam: Ha! You really expect me to believe that?

The door opens up as Pandemonium notices Bugs arriving.

  • Bugs: Gee, you're all having a barbeque and didn't invite me?
  • Yosemite Sam: (glares) Butt out, Twinkle Toes. I'm interrogating this suspect.
  • Bugs: Take it easy. I'm just here to help, but so you know, you're going about this all wrong, Pandemonium. Allow me. (to Barnyard) Excuse me, George.

He moves George off the chair before placing Pandemonium on the chair. Bugs disguises quickly as an Irish officer.

  • Bugs: (Irish accent) Isn’t it true you hated Jolly Ryan for stealing your girl? We’re onto you, Pandemonium, so ye might as well confess.

Pandemonium sweats as he looks worried.

  • Yosemite Sam: Wait, I can explain!

Bugs dashes off, reappearing quickly behind him dressed like a child with a big lollypop.

  • Bugs: (kid-like accent) That's him, mommy. That's the mean old man who popped my balloon and then bit me (cries).

Pandemonium sweats as he wipes some of it off. Bugs hits him before quickly go behind, reappearing dressed as a lady with brown hair.

  • Bugs: (feminine accent) That's him, officer (frowns). Oh, you brute! (he swings an anvil-shaped purse, hitting Pandemonium and knocking a tooth out)
  • Yosemite Sam: Ugh…

He looks dazed before Bugs dashing off. Pandemonium hears a gavel pounding before looking up, seeing Bugs, dressed as a judge, glaring sternly to him.

  • Bugs: (serious accent) General Pandemonium, how do you plead?
  • Yosemite Sam: (panics) I'm guilty! I'm guilty! (dashes to an opened cell, locking himself in)
  • Bugs: (taking off his disguise) Well, that’s taken care of. (looks at both Barnyard and Pepé) Now, Mr. George has a plane to catch.

Pandemonium, suddenly realizing, glares at where Bugs and George left.

  • Bugs: So long, Pandemonium. Enjoy the accommodations.
  • Yosemite Sam: Why, that little, ungrateful-he tricked me! I cannot believe that rabbit triumphed over me for once! How could things possibly get any worse?! (he notices the Warners on his cell)
  • Yakko and Wakko: We're the Warner Brothers...
  • Dot: ...and the Warner Sister.
  • Yosemite Sam: (worried and gulping) Oh man... this is really not my night.

The camera goes the airport, where a taxi arrives before out coming Usmarte, Sam, George, Bunny and Bugs in his trench coat and hat.

  • Bugs: Now, George, I believe I have something you're looking for (shows the document).
  • Barnyard: So you had this. Well, thanks for holding onto it.

He opens it, looking inside it. The document has plans of making a funny-looking glasses with mustache and prop nose.

  • Barnyard: Hmmm, this is going to make me rich!

An announcement is cast over the intercom.

  • Announcer: Attention! Flight 428 to Toronto, New York City and Cucamonga! All aboard!

Bugs began to head out. However, Bunny stopped him.

  • Lola: Bugs, I don't know if I can leave you again.
  • Bugs: Listen, Bunny, if you don't go with him, you'll regret it. In this crazy world, the lives of three people or animals, in this case, don't amount to... (Barnyard takes her arm and goes away to the plane)
  • Barnyard: Yeah, yeah. Fill the greens, fill the greens. We know. Gotta go. Gotta go.

The camera focuses on Bunny being dragged to the plane as George prepares to enter.

  • Barnyard: Say goodbye, Bunny dear.
  • Lola: (waving) Goodbye! (she is pulled in and the plane door closes)

The camera focues on the plane taking off while Bugs looked down.

  • Bugs: (sighs) Alone again.
  • Tweety: Don't worry, Bugs. Things will change in the future.
  • Daffy: (cheering Bugs) Exactly, pal. Someday you two will be together again..

The camera goes inside the plane, showing George smiling and chuckling at the funny face get-up before Captain Renault, now dressed as a flight attendant, coming near him and Bunny.

  • Pepé: (to Lola) So, coffee, tea or moi?

Bunny yelps, quickly shoving him aside as she dashes to the emergency exit. Bunny jumps out with a parachute as she screeches, heading downward. She lands safely onto some cargo that had been left behind and lands on the ground, with Bugs noticing. The two rabbits smile to each other, embracing each other and kissing as the parachute goes off and covered them.

  • Bugs: Here's looking for you, kid.

However, under the parachute, the two move around a bit.

  • Bugs: Kid? Oh kid?

The camera focuses on Sam and Usmarte.

  • Daffy: Let's give these two some privacy.
  • Tweety: Sam, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

The cartoon irises out on it and the credits roll.